The Tragedy (and Unmitigated Disaster) of Lifetime's Liz and Dick

The poster that started it all,
and where it should've ended too.

The romance of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton was the most iconic of the 20th century. Every move they made was front-page news. Their drunken fights were legendary. They were deemed vagrants by US Congress and the Vatican. They spent ten years in fantastic, outrageous, excessive splendor that you couldn't possibly make up.

And yet, somehow, Liz and Dick made that extraordinary romance extraordinarily dull.

For that alone, this movie should be regarded as one of the biggest failures in television history.

Watching Lifetime's interpretation of Elizabeth's fifth and sixth marriage was exhausting, for all the wrong reasons. It should boggle the mind that such a volatile couple could be so easily reduced to a simpering, whining, irritating, boozing mess. There were times when I was just bored, watching Grant Bowler and Lindsay Lohan go through the perceived motions of being the Burtons: the yelling, the kissing, and the pathetic throwing of wine glasses at each other. There were absolutely no fireworks, no chemistry, just a whole bunch of noise that amounted to nothing.

A lot of blame will fall on the performance of Lindsay Lohan, since this was touted as her huge comeback role. She was absolutely terrible in it, for sure. She failed miserably as the last great screen goddess. She delivered a performance both lifeless and histrionic, which is everything Taylor was not. There was not a moment of pathos or nuance in her scenes, nothing that would make us understand why Taylor was the way she was. But I don't think it was completely her fault. Yes, her British accent was there eight percent of the time, and she can't throw a bottle to save her life, but there were glimpses of a modicum of talent there. But between the tragedy of a script, the awful pacing, and the outrageously incompetent direction, I'm not sure there was much to be done for her. Maybe if this film was an actual full-length motion picture with an actual budget, then maybe her performance could've been salvaged. Unfortunately, this performance she gave will probably go down as the moment her career officially died. Grant Bowler, who had material just as bad as Lohan's, did much better, effectively carrying the film for them both. Still, both delivered performances well beneath their talents, and Lohan certainly gave the worst performance of her career, one she may never live down.

The blame lies much more with the direction than with the acting, though. For starters, the dialogue was ridiculous. Even Liz and Dick's infamous jibes at each other were limp. The way their history was spread out in the film was even worse, with way too much attention paid to their time on the set of Cleopatra, and not enough to the rest of the ten-year marriage. They basically skipped over their divorce and his death. The scenes were short, lifeless, and almost purposeless, even the tentpole moments. The scenes of the two playing in their films, particularly Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, were cringeworthy (that can be chalked up to Lohan's acting; easily the worst of her career). Then there was the most astonishing thing besides Lohan's acting, the use of a green screen when the couple was in Italy. I will grant the producers that the movie was filmed on a cable television budget, but they seriously couldn't afford a set? And I've seen better backdrops in movies that Taylor has starred in: how sad is that?

If anything, Liz and Dick is less a television movie than a cautionary tale of how not to make one. It wasn't even smart enough to be exploitative, or interesting enough to be trashy. Instead, what Lifetime delivered was a shameless but failed attempt to cash in on the death of Elizabeth Taylor and the desire for a revival of Lindsay Lohan's career. To be frank, Lifetime deserves to be canceled for airing this disastrous farce.

WORST: Two Outrageously Awful Minutes from Liz & Dick

She may look like Liz, but she is no Elizabeth Taylor

I have been searching desperately for a link to watch Lifetime's Liz and Dick (which I missed because of work last night), but maybe I don't have to, since I'm pretty sure this two minute collection of scenes from the highly anticipated but critically panned television movie sums it all up.

I mean, her performance is absolutely laughable. How you could play one of the most elegant and captivating women in entertainment history with such total disregard for even her accent is baffling. The second scene in this montage actually made me burst into guffaws, and the scene where Liz learns Richard is dead is something out of an SNL skit (so The Hollywood Reporter was over-exaggerating after all).

I will post a review when I finish watching it, but I don't expect much than what I've just written. Unless there are some hidden gems somewhere in that tape, Liz & Dick may go down as the moment Lindsay Lohan's career officially exploded in a blaze of melting garbage. I know that the real Liz and Dick have to be rolling in their graves right now.

Reasons Why I'm Thankful to Christina Aguilera's American Music Awards Performance

Happy Thanksgiving, my BWU readers!

I have a lot to be thankful for, but I had absolutely zero clue that Christina Aguilera would count amongst them. I'm thankful to Christina Aguilera for delivering the most outrageously awful hot mess performance I have seen all year, and maybe last year too.

Thanks to the blog Pop Trash Addicts, I saw Xtina's performance on last Sunday's American Music Awards. The pop diva and reality show judge performed a medley of three songs from her new album Lotus: "Lotus Intro", "Army of Me", and "Let There Be Love". Meaning, she did not perform either of her current singles. For whatever reason, she thought it would be better to perform three random album tracks.

Okay, fine.

If only that were the worst of it. Christina Aguilera delivered a nonsensical, messy performance that could only inspire bounds of laughter (as it did for me). Everything about it was ridiculous, from the dramatic opening, which called to mind Kylie Minogue's "All The Lovers", to her painfully unflattering outfit, to her strained vocals, to the messy drag queen circus catastrophe that was the ending.

The icing on the cake is you could tell Christina put this together thinking it would be an amazing, inspiring performance. Instead, it was a laughable farce that showed just how out of touch with the pop world she is (as if the sales of Lotus didn't prove that fact already).

But as I said, I am grateful to Christina Aguilera this Turkey Day. Thank you, for the laughs.

Check the performance out below:

"The Glee Project" Contestants Perform on The Today Show, And It Sucked

Glee is one of my favorite shows, so it pains me to say this.

If any, and I mean any of these kids end up getting a serious role on Glee, I will cease to watch the show.

The twelve finalists of The Glee Project, a reality competition where people fight for a seven episode guest role on the popular TV show, performed Katy Perry's "Firework" on The Today Show this morning. Try and blame it on nerves or whatever you want, but every single one of them were terrible. No one sang on key, some were overdramatic as hell, and everyone was so stereotypical that it was almost painful to watch.

Now I actually want to watch this show, just to see what the hell Ryan Murphy was thinking?

If you can bare it, check their performance below and share your thoughts. Do you think any one of them can stand against Lea Michele, Darren Criss, or hell, even Harry Shum Jr?

The Ten Worst Singles of 2010

With every "Get Outta My Way" that was released this year, there was a, well, whatever song you want from this list.

Some of these songs don't actually suck in terms of music. A single also deals with the promotion, the video, and the general worthiness of the song to be a single. If one or more of those fail, it affects the whole presentation, which would make it a bad single, at least in my opinion.

Then, of course, there are songs that are such epic fails that it's undeniable.

This was originally going to be a top 10 list, but I realized there were a lot more singles that failed than I originally thought. Thus, the Top 10 Worst Singles of 2010:

10. I Got You - Leona Lewis
I love Leona to bits, but everything about the release of this single was a bomb fail. The song itself, which would've served better as b-side to "Outta My Head" or "My Hands". The video, which was pretty bland compared to the epic "Bleeding Love". The promotion, which virtually didn't exist. Then again, it's pretty difficult to promote a song that didn't deserve to be a single in the first place. Seriously, though. Not "Outta My Head"?

9. 2012 (It Ain't The End) - Jay Sean feat. Nicki Minaj
Not even a verse from the feature queen Nicki Minaj could save this flop of a single. Even though I liked it in the beginning, the song couldn't hold my attention for a few weeks, hence it's pitiful performance on the BWU Singles Chart. Plus, it was a desperate attempt to cash in on the male dance-pop era he helped usher in. Instead of offering anything new, he just served up re-hashed "Down". Fans weren't buying it, which is why it ultimately failed. Plus, who bases a song off of a movie like 2012?

8. Empire State of Mind - Glee Cast

The cast of Glee usually gets it right, but they got it so horribly wrong with their cover of the iconic Jay-Z/Alicia Keys smash. Between the subpar rapping to the arrangement, nothing really worked on this song. I guess not every song is made for show choir.

7. Massive Attack - Nicki Minaj feat. Sean Garrett

There was a lot of excitement when Nicki Minaj dropped her first official single because of her epic features on songs from artists like Usher and Mariah Carey. When "Massive Attack" arrived, people were incredibly disappointed. Putting the incredible hype aside, the song was hook-less and the verses just weren't up to her previous work. Thankfully, Nicki put it behind her and released the awesome "Your Love", and she never looked back.

6. Insatiable - Nadine Coyle
I always thought that Nadine was the best singer in Girls Aloud, and I was really looking forward to her delayed debut album. Unfortunately, I kind of saw the writing on the wall when the Tesco deal was announced. What followed was a straight-up boring lead single that flopped, while Cheryl reached the top of the charts. She really couldn't just call Xenomania or something?

5. Not Myself Tonight - Christina Aguilera
One of the lyrics of this song are "And if you'd don't like it, fuck you". Well sorry, Xtina, I don't like it. For such an astonishing voice, it is really beyond me that she would release such tragedy of a track that would've failed had anybody put it out. The song was made worse by Aguilera because of the incredible irony of the title. Despite being herself, she tried to be Gaga, both in audio and video, and failed miserably.

4. Dirty Picture - Taio Cruz feat. Ke$ha

After two smash hits, Taio screwed up big time with this skeevy, tuneless crapshoot, featuring pop's favorite party girl Ke$ha. Nothing, not even two #1 hits on pop radio, could redeem this song, and it failed on the charts accordingly.

3. Can't Be Tamed - Miley Cyrus

The winner for most desperate act of the year goes to Miley Cyrus. While it's understandable that she would want to shed her Hannah Montana image for a more grown-up image, she took it to astronomic levels of ridiculousness, starting with her "pop star-as-caged animal" music video. Tack on the faux-lesbianism, the racy photo leaks, and the catchy but ultimately pretentious lyrics, you have a career-killing mess that turned the mammoth seller into a flop. She probably won't admit it, but she's reaching for that blonde wig in her mind.

2. We Are The World 25 - Various Artists
I felt bad putting this first, simply because it was for a good cause and I'm sure it raised some money to help the earthquake victims in Haiti. But dear God, Michael Jackson is certainly roasting on a rotisserie after hearing this absolute disaster of a track. The inclusion of the horrific rap verse was probably the biggest smack in the face to beautiful 18985 Grammy-winning original.

1. The Time (Dirty Bit) - Black Eyed Peas
I was a huge fan of their last album The E.N.D., so I was expecting a lot when I heard they were releasing a new single and album. I stopped at the single. "The Time", while exciting for ten seconds, was so wrong in virtually every sense. The over-sample of the 80's classic from Dirty Dancing was pointless. There was no discernable melody. There was this feeling listening to it that, while it aims at being this epic party record, it is way too cold and calculated and computerized to work completely. So while I will continue playing it on my iPod, I will continue feeling wrong about it, no matter how hard I try not to. For that reason, it's my worst single of the year.

WORST!!! Katie Price Performs Disastrous New Single On TV!

Where a pair of implants will take you in this industry....

British trainwreck Katie Price, fresh off a new marriage to cagefighter Alex Reid, is back at work, this time as a pop star. The glamour model performed her debut single "Free To Love Again" on GMTV this past week, and let me tell you, it is a mess.

The whole thing is just ridiculous. The terrible lipsynching, the lack of dancing, the song itself (one of the worst I've ever heard), it all came together in a fiery display of undeserved celebrity failure. The funny thing is she at least had the decency to admit that she's piss poor minutes later on the couch.

Luckily, it appears that Price's pop star aspirations won't go anywhere. Released this week, the single hasn't even cracked the Top 40.

Watch the ridiculousness below:



Do you think Katie Price has a career as a singer? Comment below!

The Media Debacle That Is LeBron James and "His Decision"

NBA superstar LeBron James to join the
Miami Heat next season

Last night, NBA superstar Lebron James announced to the world that he was joining the Miami Heat, officially ditching the Cleveland Cavaliers after seven years with his hometown team.

He announced his decision on ESPN in a special called "The Decision", live from the Boys and Girls Club of America in Greenwich, Connecticut. After a good ten minutes of the interviewer building up unnecessary tension with pointless questions, LeBron finally dropped the bomb that broke the hearts of New Yorkers, Chicagoans, and Clevelanders alike.

Now, I will admit that I don't really follow basketball like my mother does. Frankly, LeBron James' decision wouldn't have made a difference to me at all, even if he came to New York. That said, I tuned in to see what the big deal was.

It was big, all right. A big disastrous mess.

What I witnessed in that forty minutes (I missed the first twenty) was one of the most narcissistic displays of star power I have ever seen. I simply don't understand why he went through all of this trouble, building all of the tension, hosting an hourlong special dedicated to what should've been a few words: "I chose (fill in the blank)". He should've just released a statement to splash over the front pages. Instead, we had to hear how emotional the decision was for him and how he was deciding even at the last minute, as if he was negotiating a nuclear arms treaty. The whole thing was frankly absurd in just that regard, but the heart of this lies in Cleveland. I wasn't aware of this until tonight, but apparently James is regarded as a hero in his hometown, even a king. People laid all of their basketball dreams on the superstar, and I would assume LeBron did his best to make his fans proud. So what puzzles me is why he would humiliate them so blatantly with this special. Yes, he's a massive sports star, but why go on national television to basically say "Sayonara" to the people who supported him for seven years? I believe he had the right to move on if he felt Cleveland wasn't going to deliver him victory, but he did it in such a classless, insulting way that I doubt he will ever be forgiven by his fans there.

Of course it wouldn't be a debacle if there was only one side, right?

The immediate response to LeBron's not so shocking announcement was utter disgust from his home state of Ohio. ESPN, after the initial interview, aired live footage of fans groaning as the decision came in. Then, in what I can only describe as insanity, they aired someone setting LeBron's jersey ablaze in the street, as they were talking to him. Twitter went into hyperdrive, with trending topics focusing on reactions, the burning jersey, and almost inexplicably instant comparisons to Scottie Pippen. In fact, he is still the top TT as I type. Anyone looking for a beacon of grace certainly wasn't finding it with majority owner of the Cavaliers Dan Gilbert. He shockingly blasted him in an open letter on the team's website, labeling him shameful, selfish, and a coward. He even went as far as to accuse "the formerly self-titled King" of quitting during the NBA playoffs last month.

His anger is understandable, sure, but the letter was so unsportsman-like, it makes one think that LeBron really did choose right.

Whether he chose the right team will be up for weeks of debate, but this media circus he created was certainly a huge bust. LeBron, who hours ago was labeled a hero and a king by many, is now facing backlash that ranges from being new teammate Dwayne Wade' second string (clearly LeBron has never heard Jay-Z's hit "Empire State of Mind") to being a selfish, self-obsessed traitor. Meanwhile, his grieving hometown looks like shamefully petty on national television and the Dan Gilbert looks like a tacky ass asking for a humiliating loss next season. Let's also throw the New Yorks Kncks in there for good measure, who have been preparing for LeBron for years, only to be snubbed. I can't wait for the morning papers about this one.

While he may be labeled as a king, it is hard to deny that his crown may be tarnished just a bit.

UNBELIEVABLE: MJ's Death Is Katherine's Fault, Says Joe Jackson

Just when you thought that Joe Jackson couldn't get any more reprehensible...

The Jackson patriarch decided to honor the one-year anniversary of his son's passing by blaming his wife Katherine for her son's demise. In a taped interview with British newspaper News of the World (the same tabloid that exposed Sarah Ferguson last month), he revealed that he told Katherine that Michael would still be alive if she had intervened more in his life. The tabloid also reported that Joe blew up at Katherine in the moments after Michael was declared dead. "I couldn't bottle up my feelings," Joe reportedly told the newspaper.

June 25th will mark the first anniversary of Michael Jackson's shocking death from an overdose of propofol. Joe believed that if Katherine had spent more time with him, then Michael would have been "relaxed" and healthier. He said that Katherine didn't want to invade Michael's privacy, an issue they argued about many times. Joe believed that Michael was looking "frail" and "a bit funny" in the last months of his life, and that Katherine could have made the difference.

Joe also talked about Debbie Rowe's involvement in Michael's children's lives. According to him, the kids do acknowledge her existence, and that she has spent time with them. He notes, however, that there isn't a closeness between them yet.

Joe Jackson has done some pretty questionable things since Michael's untimely passing, but blaming his wife for her son's death is the worst, by far. What makes it even more outrageous is that he is slating her so close to MJ's death anniversary. It makes a person (me) wonder how much he really cares about his family. Katherine is trying to raise her grandchildren in peace, while he is gabbing with tabloids about his private family matters.

WORST: Houston, What's The Problem? Whitney's Concert Disasters

Whitney, what's wrong?

Pop legend Whitney Houston may not be on drugs anymore, but the weight they carried clearly hasn't lifted.

The singer, currently embarking on a world tour supporting her successful comeback album I Look To You, is facing intense criticism from fans and the press after a string of lackluster, if not outright terrible, performances.

Her latest concert, at London's O2 Arena, was apparently so terrible that some fans walked out of the show after only twenty minutes, even though some paid up to $156 for tickets. Whitney, who was diagnosed with a respiratory infection, struggled to hit the famous high notes in songs like "I Will Always Love You". She wasn't able to finish her classic hit "Greatest Love of All", stopping after a few verses, according to reports. She blamed her vocal issues on the air conditioning, and even referred to her powerful pipes as being "temperamental".

Another major criticism was her appearance. The diva appeared haggard, bloated, and out of shape at the O2 Arena. It comes as a major surprise, since Whitney has been looking fantastic for most of the tour so far.

So, what's wrong with Whitney?

While she reportedly was hospitalized for a respiratory infection in Paris last month, criticisms of her vocal performance appeared long before then. The Australian leg of her tour was viciously attacked for what concert-goers considered terrible vocals. Her croaky voice has been blamed by her concert promoters on her smoking habits, while it also possible that the drug abuse in the last few years has left irreversible damage on her voice. Finally, she just may not have been physically ready to do such an extensive tour spanning Asia and Europe so far (no North American plans have been made).

I am a huge fan, and she can deny it as much as she wants, but there is clearly something wrong in the world of Whitney. Let's just hope she can fix it before her comeback is officially tarnished.

Jedward's "Under Pressure": It's So Terrible, It's Actually Offensive

I didn't give a damn about X Factor gruesome twosome John and Edward (a.k.a. Jedward) getting a #2 hit with "Under Pressure", because I knew that it was a television-led farce that would die out quickly.

Then I checked out Mediabase radio stats, and guess what I found, sitting pretty at #79 with 59 spins on US radio?

Jedward's "Under Pressure".

Absolutely shocked, I watched their music video and I realized that its actually more hideous than I had imagined. They took an iconic good song, fused it with iconic bad song, laid down some subpar vocals, and threw in the ultimate one-hit wonder for shits and giggles. The result is such an unimaginable stain on the face of current pop music that, if I didn't know they were serious, would seem like a parody of pop rap. Unfortunately, the inflated egos they gained through their X Factor success probably made them think this was acceptable to release, when it should've never left the studio. Actually, scratch that. It should've never been recorded on tape or computer or whatever used.

If you have strong constitutions, than check out the video:

If You Thought Heidi Montag's Face Couldn't Get Any Worse...

I normally avoid writing about anything related to "banes-of-pop-culture" Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, but I simply couldn't ignore this.

In fact, if my roommate wasn't sleeping right now, I probably would have either gasped loudly in shock or thrown up a little bit.

This is a new picture of Heidi, post-surgery, at the Pure nightclub on Valentine's Day:



And just in case you argue it's a bad angle, here's another one:


For the first time, I actually feel really bad for Heidi Montag. She must've had self-esteem issues up the freakin' wazoo to allow this obscene level of monstrosity to be carried out on herself. It also doesn't help having a douchebad of a husband not telling you what you are doing makes no sense. While I was never a fan of hers, she was a beautiful girl, just a few months ago. Now, she looks like someone who should be on Real Housewives or something. Hell, Kim Zolciak from Real Housewives of Atlanta looks both younger and prettier than Heidi now.

What a shame...

P.S. Here's one more for good measure:

WORST: Jennifer Lopez Guest Hosts "Lopez Tonight"

I would tell her to stick to her day job, but "Louboutins" is flopping right now.

Jennifer Lopez switched places with George Lopez on his late night talk show on TBS "Lopez Tonight". She opened the show with one of the most awkward, unfunny monologues I have ever seen in my life. Seriously, it came off so phony that I wouldn't blame J-Lo for laughing about how bad it was.

On a good note, she looked absolutely stunning!

Check it out (if you can) below:

Even A Devastating Earthquake Won't Stop Rush Limbaugh From Being A Heartless Waste of Space

 A few weeks back, conservative commentator Rush Limbaugh suffered a heart attack. Thankfully (for him, and those who listen to his daily brand of Republican bitching), he survived the medical ordeal and hoped back on the radio saddle not too long after. Now, it would be fair to assume that the incident would be enough to instill just a tiny bit of compassion in a man who constantly toes the lines of racism, sexism, and overall bad taste.

Clearly not.

In the wake of the devastation caused by the earthquake in Haiti, Limbaugh decided the only appropriate thing to do was to use the tragedy as a way to criticize President Obama.

Seriously.

The perpetual douche said on his syndicated radio program that the earthquake will allow Obama to boost his sagging approval ratings by showcasing his "compassionate" and "humanitarian" qualities. Apparently, those are bad qualities to have during an international crisis. Throwing in some borderline lite-racism, he also said that the president would use the earthquake to "boost his credibility with the black community".

If that wasn't bad enough, Limbaugh said that "we have already donated to Haiti. It's called US income tax".

The Haitian earthquake is shaping up to be one of the worst disasters this millennium and all this grossly overpaid monster can think of is Obama's non-existent scheming and the financial fallout? Forget the hundreds of bodies lining the streets of Port-au-Prince, or the thousands of people probably still trapped in the rubble, or left homeless and starving after their lives were literally shattered by this natural disaster. No, the real story of this international catastrophe is Obama and money.

So, according to Limbaugh, the right thing to do would be for Obama to just sit around and do nothing for a bit until the moral outrage of the global community forces his hand. Actually, that sounds a bit familiar... oh wait, didn't President Bush that with Hurricane Katrina, which happened on US soil. And look how well that turned out.

Honestly, if Limbaugh is too much of a cheapskate or jackass to care about his fellow man who are suffering in ways he will never experience, then he can very simply sit on his ass and shut up, waiting for the day when some otherworldly force finally decided to rid the country of his filth. How this man can survive a heart attack and be this cruel is utterly beyond my understanding.

Hot Mess Alert! Katie Price and Her Cagefighting Boyfriend Celebrate Halloween

I have been wanting to write about Katie Price for months now, but I just didn't have the motivation.

Until I saw this.

This is UK's premier trainwreck Katie Price, aka Jordan, dressed up for Halloween with her boyfriend Alex Reid. In case you are unaware, or don't really care, he is the cross-dressing, rape-porn acting cage fighter that Katie has been parading around since her ridiculous divorce for Australian pop singer Peter Andre.

Note that Katie has three children.

 

Adam Lambert Swagga Jacks Kylie and Blake Lewis For New Album Cover

American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert is dropping his new album For Your Entertainment later this year, and he revealed the album artwork today:



It's bad enough the cover is an utter hot mess, but the concept has already been done, a hundred times better, by Kylie Minogue for her 2007 album X (even down to the font):



Lambert also apparently drew inspiration from fellow runner-up Blake Lewis, who used the space theme for his disastrous flop album Audio Day Dream:



Adam Lambert borrowing from two albums that flopped in the United States (love you Kylie) is not a good look. Borrowing from two flop albums to make a hideous album is an even worse look. It's one of the worst album covers of the year, by far.

For Your Entertainment is due for release November 23rd.

Me to MTV: Ban Kanye West From Future VMAs, Now!

I'll have full coverage of the VMAs later today, but I had to speak on what Kanye West did to Taylor Swift as she accepted the Best Female Video award.

If you have no clue what I am talking about, here is what happened: Taylor Swift won Best Female Video over Beyonce, who was expected to take the award home. As Taylor, in disbelief herself, gave her speech, Kanye came up on stage, took the mic from her and said that Beyonce had the best video. Everyone in the audience, including Beyonce, was absolutely mortified.

I wish I could say that this was anomaly in basic human decency, but alas, Kanye has a record for being absolutely tasteless and rude. In fact, it's the third time that he has pulled something like this at an MTV awards show.

And this should be his last.

MTV, please teach this A-level jerk a lesson and ban him from future VMA ceremonies. I don't care if he releases the next Thriller. What he, a grown man, did to a freaking 19-year old was inexcusable (by the way, his blog apology is utter BS). As much satisfaction it would give me to see something similar happen to him, I would rather he not attend at all. Clearly, he doesn't know how to behave.

Me To Jermaine Jackson: Shame On You!

Yesterday afternoon, Jermaine Jackson held a press conference in London to formally announce plans for a Michael Jackson tribute concert to be held in Vienna, Austria on September 26th. Performing at the concert, besides Jermaine of course, is Mary J. Blige, Chris Brown, Stevie Wonder, Natalie Cole, Akon, and more.

Actually, scratch Mary, Chris, and Natalie off that list, since their representatives claimed they never agreed to the show.

In fact, for good measure, cross off Stevie and Akon too, because I wouldn't be surprised if they pulled out as well.

That's because this show, meant to be a tribute to one of pop music's most iconic figures, is nothing but a posturing, indulgent, and tacky attempt to cash in on his death.

Now, I'm not saying that Jermaine is some callous money-hungry graverobber, but somewhere in the back of his mind, he has to know that this concert serves no purpose.

He claims that this was for Michael's European fans. As if they didn't have televisions and couldn't watch the official memorial when it was held in July. As if they didn't attend the viewing parties held all over the world. As if they didn't schlock by the tens of thousands to Michael's Dangerous and HIStory tours, which saw no dates in the United States.

And if you were going to hold such a concert, why the hell in Austria? No offense to the country, it's lovely, but Michael had zero connection to that country. How about the United States, where he was born? Or Romania, where he held his massive HBO concert in 1992? London? Paris? Berlin? All of these places would have made sense, but not Austria. Unless, of course, Austria was the only place that would hold such a farce on their soil, and that they are the only ones that would bankroll it.

There is no tangible reason for this concert's existence, which is why "performers" are dropping out left and right. This is simply more of the same; exploitation of a man who's seen it since the age of five. Even in death.

I know that money is a powerful motivator, Jermaine, but for the sake of your family, the fans, your dignity, and Michael, stop this stupidity and let your brother rest in peace.

Me to the Obama-Bashing "Birthers": Either Get Lives and Shut Up, Or Admit You're Racist

When I first heard rumors that Obama wasn't a legitimate United States citizen during the campaign, I tossed it aside as pointless garbage drummed up by lame people desperate to tear him down.

Six months into the presidency of the first ever African American to hold the title, the rumors have seemingly gained a second wind. A woman at a GOP town hall accused both Obama of hiding his birth certificate and the government of ignoring it. A congressional bill that requires presidential candidates to show their birth certificates has been co-sponsored by GOP House and Senate members. Various commentators, ranging from Lou Dobbs to Rush Limbaugh have discussed the topic, either denouncing the rumors or fueling them.

The "birthers", as they are apparently called, refuse to look at the cold hard evidence; Obama's birth certificate confirms that he is a United States citizen. They refuse to acknowledge that numerous legitimate (there's that word again) news services have confirmed the certificate's authenticity. They even ignore a news clipping from a Hawaiian newspaper published in 1961 announcing his birth (his name is not listed, just his parents).

No, instead they circulate a ludicrous rumor that Obama was actually born in Kenya and that there is a massive conspiracy to hide it. Forget the fact that, if this was true, the validity of this country's entire government would be shattered, since a conspiracy of this nature would require cooperation from virtually every single governmental agency in the country. They would rather believe that Obama was not born in this country, despite numerous evidence to the contrary. Why?

These "birthers" and their supporters should be ashamed and embarrassed by their blatant idiocy and disrespect of the president. It is one thing to disagree with the president, but it is a whole different situation to attack a man's integrity with baseless accusations. These charges against Obama by these people are not only stupid, they frankly reek of racism.

I am not someone who throws the idea of racism around carelessly. As a young African-American man living in New York City, I have encountered many racial situations, and I take pride in my ability to identify racism when it is truly present. This is one of those times. This is the first time that I have heard accusations about a president's citizenship. John McCain, who wasn't born in any of the 50 states but in the Panama Canal Zone, wasn't subjected to such ridiculous speculation. He, nor any of the 43 presidents before Obama, received demands to reveal their birth certificate. Why is it that Obama is being accused? Is it because his father was African, and therefore couldn't possibly be a US citizen himself? Maybe it's the similarly baseless accusations that he is a Muslim that inspire the ire of these people.

There could be another reason, but it is most likely rooted in racist intentions. I am beginning to believe that these people, under the guise of fairness, are so terrified at the idea of a non-white Christian person as president that they will concoct absolute garbage. These people have already proven their racism by implying that Muslims were bad as they accused Obama of being one. If that wasn't bad enough, now they are implying that people with direct ties to Africa can't legitimately hold high government office.

It's time to stop this. These birthers need to get over this bullshit they are on, because it is embarrassing to everyone. Accept the fact that Barack Obama, not John McCain or even Hilary Clinton, is the president. If you seriously can't, then at least stop hiding behind moralistic shields and admit that you are scared of an African-American president, or that you don't think that an African-American president can do as good a job as a Caucasian president can. Either way, you would ultimately admit that you are a racist. It doesn't make you a good person at all, but at least it's honest, something that you hypocritically demand from the president.

Good News, Kara! A Pop Song Exists That’s Worse Than “No Boundaries”, and It’s Called “It’s My Time” by Jade Ewen

           

Jade Ewen (right) has released “It’s My Time”, the UK’s entry for Eurovision 2009 and the British version of “No Boundaries”, the American Idol season eight song co-written by Kara DioGuardi (left)

American Idol winners’ singles have never been known for their Grammy worthiness, but it reached a whole new low with “No Boundaries”,co-written by fourth judge Kara DioGuardi. The song will go down in AI history for having the most clichéd lyrics and for being so lacking a melody that it made both Adam Lambert and Kris Allen sound bad live.

Just as I thought that I found one of the worst TV-related singles ever (as much as it sucks, it can’t be the worst song ever), I was corrected when I stumbled upon “It’s My Time” by Jade Ewen.

The song was the United Kingdom’s entry in the annual Eurovision Song Contest, written by Broadway legend Andrew Lloyd Webber and songwriting queen Diane Warren. The song came in fifth place, but it was the country’s best showing since 2002, so it was still a success.

Well, not really.

“It’s My Time” is a terrible song. I mean terrible, and this is coming from someone who loves an overblown pop ballad. Lyrically, it could pass an American Idol coronation song, with its lyrics about climbing past adversity to reach the spotlight. While the concept has been wrung to death, never before has it sounded so boring. First off, the title is repeated about a hundred times, as if we’re going to forget that it is “her time”, even though we want to. Although to its credit, without the repetition, we wouldn’t know where the chorus was, since the song’s structure is so scattered and unfocused. Another problem is it’s production. While Andrew Lloyd Webber has produced some of the most beloved music in theater, pop is a genre he should definitely steer clear from. It’s over-the-top, melismatic arrangement may sound rich, but its ultimately exhausting and annoying.

Jade Ewen is a good singer, but it’s not really hard to imagine someone else singing this song even better. Still, she happens to be the best part of this dramatic snoozefest. She’s very convincing as she sings this drivel, as if she really believes that this is her moment in the sun.

If only that were true. “It’s My Time”, after its physical release, peaking at flop-worthy #27, well below Eurovision’s winner, Norway’s Alexander Rybak at #10.

It seems like the British people came to their senses about this track, but how on Earth did this place fifth in Eurovision? Similarly, how did the Idol allow “No Boundaries” to be recorded?

Finally, when it comes to contests such as those, why on Earth is the worst of pop music presented?

The Reason Why Chris Brown Is Banned From This Blog Until Further Notice

TMZ.com has released a picture of Rihanna's extremely visible injuries sustained by Chris Brown's attack.

When I first saw them, I couldn't speak.

It's unfathomable that someone who has portrayed himself as an upstanding human being could be responsible for this:

As of right now, Chris Brown is done in my book. Neither him nor his music will be featured on this blog unless it pertains to the domestic violence case, effective immediately.

Fans of Chris Brown, if you defend this, after seeing this pictures, I suggest you follow Brown's statement and get some therapy, because clearly you don't understand the seriousness of violence of this scale, and that is inexcusable, almost as much as Brown's actions.

My thoughts are with Rihanna as she recovers from this tragic ordeal.