Some Notes About Mel Gibson's Rants Against His Ex

By now, everyone has heard at least one of the shocking angry rants from movie star Mel Gibson against his baby's mother Oksana Grigorieva. Instead of writing an essay about the tapes, I won't even give him that much of my time and just list some important notes to take away from the whole fiasco.

Note 1: His career, as he and we know it, is over
While many people have warned against such strong statements, it is pretty hard to imagine what kind of career this man will have after the full scope of these tapes are realized. He has shown bigotry against everything not white male: blacks, gays, jews, hispanics, and women. You could essentially use those tapes as an encyclopedia of slurs. Ironically, the industry he works in is filled with plenty of the people he harshly insulted. I can't imagine any actor, actress, producer, director, or even gaffer who is one of those denominations who would want to work with him.

Note 2: He cannot hide behind alcohol this time
Mel Gibson's infamous 2006 anti-semitic rant was the result of being pulled over by police and arrested for a DUI. While he could argue that the nasty incident was the result of the booze, there is no excuse that could explain away blatant racism, misogyny, and unspeakable violence. Sorry, there's no way to get out of this one, Mad Max

Note 3: He needs help. Serious. ass. help.
While he may a racist, a misogynist and an alleged perpetrator of unspeakable violence, but it is also clear he is in desperate need of therapy. Anger management, sensitivity training, the works. Not only is his behavior completely unacceptable in most circles of humanity, it is also unhealthy. When you're unhealthy, you usually got to a hospital. I'm sure Bellevue has openings this time of year.

It's a damn shame that an actor that I have enjoyed in films could have fallen so far from glory.

Some Notes About... Lady Gaga and Beyonce's "Telephone"

Gaga and Beyonce as murderesses in the 9-minute long "Telephone"

Three months after its announcement as the official second single of the pop epic "The Fame Monster", the highly-anticipated video for Lady Gaga and Beyonce's "Telephone" was released in a double world premiere on E! and VEVO. After three days of salivating over this "true pop event" (as Gaga called it), here are some important things to take away...

1. Comparing it to "Bad Romance" is both pointless and inaccurate
People across the Internet have been using "Bad Romance" as an excuse to blast "Telephone" as a failure. The only problem with this logic is that there are two very different videos. "Bad Romance" was a serious, dramatic, layered video (I mean, Russian sex trafficking?). "Telephone" is clearly a parody of both pop culture and the old western films. Gaga and Bey are having a laugh; you should be too.

1b. That being said...
This video, as enjoyable as it is (take away sleep, I have watched this video non-stop, in virtually setting possible at Trinity College), is not better than "Bad Romance". To be honest, I'm not sure Gaga will be able to top that one anytime soon, and that's not a bad thing. 

2. Gaga loves her product placement
If you thought "Bad Romance" had too much, you'll be shell-shocked by "Telephone". Everything from Diet Coke to Miracle Whip featured a cameo in this video. While it could borderline on irritating, Gaga's use of them all is inventive and hilarious. If I'm being honest, I preferred those cameos to Tyrese Gibson's.

3. Beyonce has been revitalized through this video
Yes, Beyonce is untouchable in many areas of popular music. But thank the Gods for Gaga, because she unveiled as a side of the diva we haven't really seen before: her wacky side. Assuming it was a one-off, Beyonce let loose and clearly had fun with the crazy costumes, dramatic makeup, and the careless murder of harmless diners. It was a joy to watch.

4. "Telephone" is 100 times better than "Video Phone"
Let me take it a step further: Gaga should direct all of Beyonce's videos from now on.

5. The video was smidgen too long
While I nearly died at the prospect of a 10 minute long music video from a post-"Bad Romance" Gaga, the actuality was a bit tiring. I'm sure I'll love the eventual TV edit a lot more (with less prison scenes in particular).

6. The sequel to this video is "Alejandro"
Why? "To be continued"  and it has been confirmed. Here's to hoping for another Gagonce collaboration soon (as in not another freakin' four months).

7. The Gaga/Beyonce diner dance sequence is the best dance sequence I have seen in years
Where else would you see these two pop titans dancing amongst dead people? Epic.

8. Alongside "Bad Romance", Gaga has revived the art of music videos
Sometime after Madonna went British and Michael donned devil ears calling Tommy Mottola evil, the thought disappeared from music videos. Most of them just featured a cheap setting with some pretty good dancing. Thanks to Lady Gaga's headline-grabbing, partially banned music videos, there is a legitimate interest in music videos again. So note to other pop stars: step your game up.

9. "Telephone" is currently, and will continue to be, the best music video of the year
Unless Gaga pulls some next level stuff with "Alejandro" (and hopefully "Dance in the Dark")

10. GAGA AND BEYONCE ATE FROM THE SAME HONEY BUN!!!

Am I the only one totally freaking out/loving this? I mean, it's the closest thing we'll ever get to a Beyonce/Gaga makeout session (unless Gaga pulls some next level stuff on "Alejandro")

 

Some Notes About The Movie Avatar

As I mentioned in my last post, I went to go see Avatar this past weekend in 2D. It was this same weekend where the movie surpassed the billion dollar mark worldwide. I wasn't sure about writing a review, but considering its immediate global significance, I thought I could at least do a Some Notes post.

So, without further preface, here are some basic notes about Avatar (beware of spoilers!)

Note #1: Avatar, and I say with as little overhype as possible, is a visual masterpiece without a single past, present, or future rival (that is, until Avatar 2 comes out)

Note #2: 30 minutes into the film, I decided I wanted to live on Pandora (ok, maybe without the huge flower panthers that could kill you in one fell swoop)

Note #3: Every human character who has an avatar, looks about three times better as an Avatar (Sigourney Weaver looked like she was in her 30's)

Note #4: The best actress in the film was Zoe Saldana, who played the Na'vi princess Neytiri. The fact that she could all that heavy emoting around all of that computer-generated stuff is astonishing.

 Note #4.5: Zoe Saldana should prepare for the onslaught of horny cult-following, Trekkie-esque losers who are about to become obssessed with her because of this film

Note #5: The creatures in this film are the most engrossing I have seen since Pokemon debuted in 1998

Note #5.5: With that said, The Pokemon Company should play James Cameron as much money as humanly possible to make a 3d, CGI, live action movie adaptation of Pokemon. Because let's be honest, the big red bird dinosaur is really Ho-Oh on steroids. Imagine what the "king of the world" could do with 493 epically designed characters. It would be so amazing that I am allowing this half-not approach paragraph status.

Note #6: Even though I saw it in effective 2D, I still recommend seeing it in its true format of 3D.

Note #6.5: Torrenting this film is absolutely disgraceful; not because its depriving people of money, but because you are robbing yourself of an immersive film experience that you would be foolish to miss. Unless you are living in your parent's house and you are pas the age of 29, pony up the ten bucks and see this film for real.

Note #7: Now about the plot. It's not that it's bad, but it is kind of predictable. It's very Dances With Wolves, except on a lush alien planet. There are some surprises, but if you have seen the "gone native" films before, you shouldn't be too confused.

Note #8: Anyone crying foul against the so-called anti-American, anti-war message of the film has the emotional depth of a puddle on a NYC street.

Note #9: The visual certainly adds to the concept of "seeing" nature, the Na'vi's philosophy/religion

Note #10: There is a sex scene, and it is stunningly tasteful and romantic (and reportedly longer in the Blu-ray/DVD edition)

Note #11: The most epic scene? When Jake rides down onto the Na'vi on the Ho-Oh on steroids-looking dinosaur bird.

Final Notes: The hype about this film isn't overblown. It is truly an experience watching this film. The visual presentation is flawless, and the story is engaging enough to absorb people into the world of Pandora. There is a reason that people are seeing this film multiple times. It is the modern epic of our time, even it has some superficial flaws (plot-wise, of course). Plus, there is a good chance this movie will surpass Titanic to become the most successful film in the history of global cinema (not adjusted for inflation; then the title goes to Gone with the Wind). I don't condone peer pressure, but do you really want to be one of the people on Earth not to see this film? So, what are you waiting for? Go SEE it!

Some Notes About New Moon...

Last weekend, I went with my friends to go see New Moon. The movie theater was PACKED, for that film alone, so I figured it would be a movie worth seeing. After mulling it over for a week, here are some thoughts about the film:

About 65% of New Moon was about someone staring. Whether it was Edward at Bella, Bella at Edward, Jacob at Bella, Bella out of a window, a lot of the film was them all just staring. In case you didn't know, staring does not a good film make.

For a 17-year old, Taylor Lautner is ripped as fuck. It's an appropriate note to make, since 70% of the movie featured him shirtless. I'm being much more respectful than the multitude of girls (and some boys) whose tongues were hitting the floor whenever he came on the screen, like he was a steak on a silver platter.

A fish flopping on dry land has more charisma than Kristen Stewart.

There wasn't enough of Alice Cullen in this film. Or Emmett. Or Rosalie. Or Esme. Or Jasper. Or Carlisle. In case you haven't figured it out, the Cullen family actually deserved some screen time. I mean, they are more interesting than Edward and Bella combined.

Michael Sheen (the head of the Volturi) and Dakota Fanning, in their 10 minute long scene, outperformed the rest of the cast by at least 65 miles.

Sorry Edward, but Bella is a complete crackhead (and there were scenes where she looked like one too) for not choosing Jacob. Come on, werewolf? Awesome.

The ending is a big WTF?

By the way, the film has no real discernible plot.

Final Note: Unless you either love Twilight or want to see a 17-year old being blatantly sexually exploited, you probably want to skip this film. Go see Precious instead.

Some Notes on Justin Bieber's "One Time"

- Justin Bieber looks and sounds like he's 12 years old. He's really 15 years old.

- A 15 year-old who looks and sounds like he's 12 singing about spending his last dime on his girlfriend is just ridiculous.

- "One Time" = RedOne + Disney.

- Spinners + Silly string = 15-year old's house party? Hell no.

- Justin trying to look street with the fitted and the hoodie while smiling like a goofball is not a good look.

- Why the hell is Usher in this video?

- Finally, and I cannot believe I am about to write this, but "One Time" makes the Jonas Brothers' "Burnin' Up" look Shakespearean.

- While his voice sounds good, he should've waited until his voice broke before recording an album.